I feel as though today is the start of the rest of my life. For those of you that know me, this might sound a bit odd considering that I am 32 years old. But allow me to explain. For the past 10 years, I pretty much wasted my younger years away and took a lot for granted. Don't get me wrong, I have a great life. I have an amazing husband, a big house, and as of recent, a great job that has made me realize my true potential. The latter I believe is what truly jump started my ambition and made me realize I can do anything and I just need to keep pushing forward no matter how difficult things might seem. So if I seem to have it all, what exactly am I referring to that has made me feel like today is the beginning of the rest of my life? Well for the past 10 years, I have been overweight, eating whatever I've wanted and being lazy. I quit caring about my appearance, but worse than that, I quit caring about my health. At one point, there was a glimmer of hope and I lost 25 pounds, down from 160 to 135. I remember feeling great. I am not sure what it was but something threw me off the wagon once that happened, I never attempted to get back up. I am now at my heaviest, 162 pounds and feeling the worst about myself that I've ever felt. I know I am not an ugly woman, but the excess weight makes me feel like a blob. I feel as though everyone is staring at me, particularly when I order something bad at a restaurant and they are thinking "look at that fat, gross pig." Lately, the media has began to have a more positive outlook on "girls with curves" but this has still not made me feel good about myself. I don't considered what I have simply curves and I know I don't have the striking features of the plus size models being praised. If it weren't enough to have the lowest level of self esteem I've ever had, I have also had health issues arise as a result of my unhealthy lifestyle. Not only do I have high blood pressure but I have been having chest pains and had to have my first stress test and heart ultrasound a week ago. The entire time during the procedure, I kept thinking "I am too young for this." I am too young to not feel sexy in front of my husband. I am too young to worry about having a heart attack soon. So with these reasons, and the fact that I love fashion and want to fit into cute outfits, I decided to take back my life. I decided that today was going to be the first day I would work toward getting my life, looks, and health back. Plus my husband (who said he would never diet or work out) has been eating healthier, working out, and has lost almost 50 pounds so if he is doing it, I feel like I should stop making excuses and make I happen.
There are so many diets out there but I am not looking for a temporary solution. I want a diet I can stick to for the rest of my life and not feel miserable or deprived. I have watched a lot of documentaries as of late and the consensus that most people are not aware of is that high sugar and carb content in foods is what's causing America's obesity epidemic. Obviously, cutting out sugar and carbs altogether would make for a really miserable and miserable to be around Jenn. So I decided that I am going to cut back on the amounts and try to balance my Carb and sugar intake throughout the day. In addition to that, I plan on working out in some form or another for at least 45 minutes 4 days a week.
Yesterday, I created a menu of 8 days worth of meals by doing some research online and determining easy foods that would work for my diet. I am extremely busy and don't have much time to cook on weeknights so pre-made meals, frozen or canned items are truly my best friend. You would not believe though how much sugars and carbs are in these items. A lot of people have asked if I've ever tried Lean Cuisines. Of course I have but although they are thought to be healthy, most have a ton of sugar in them to make them more palatable. So what I had to do was research nutrition facts online for pre-made meals such as lean cuisines to determine which ones had low levels of Carb and sugar. After my menus were prepared, I went to the grocery and spent no joke $499.00! I about choked when they told me my total but then tried to look at the bright side that I would be getting my gas cheap since Fry's gave you gas points when you shopped in store.
Today, I actually forced myself to pack food for the entire day and to eat whenever I felt hungry. Not only that, I had a bottle of water by me at all times and drank as I would get thirsty. If I learned anything from today, it's that I need to start listening to my body. That applies also to when I am feeling full.
I know the first day is always bad but I honestly was not prepared for just how bad it was. It seemed like not matter how frequently I ate and despite the fact that I was eating a ton of protein, I was always starving. No, not just hungry, famished! I keep trying to tell myself that it will get better and my body just needs to get adjusted. Today was also the first time I had committed more than a few minutes to exercising. I walked at a fast pace (with running occasionally) on the treadmill for 20 minutes and spent 25 minutes on a stationary exercise bike peddling up multiple "hills." Surprisingly, it went by quick and wasn't too bad. The thing I know will happen and that I dread is that I will be really sore tomorrow.
Other than the feeling super hungry all day although I ate more meals in one day than I usually eat in 3, I actually felt pretty good. I felt really energetic which made my work productivity better. I felt like I stayed on task more than usual. Anyways, I am ready to go to bed but I am going to post the menu of what I ate today below. I will be keeping this journal daily in the beginning to keep track of my progress, feelings, etc. and in hopes of helping other girls who want to lose weight. I would love to hear from others about their weight loss journey so please feel free to post. Thanks
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