Today, I ate an entire pizza! Haha, totally kidding. But seriously, there were several times that I wished I could. It was the first time since starting my diet 2 days ago that I began having bad thoughts. The first was at lunch. I volunteered today at the State Bar of Arizona Convention since I work for a law office and am part of a legal administrator's group. Lunch was served at this convention so once again, I was a bit worried about falling off the wagon. Luckily, that didn't happen. The lunch was a build your own sandwich bar with sides of salad and potato salad. I was determined to get through this the same way I had the previous day. First, I filled my plate with salad topped with ranch. I gotta say that ranch has truly been my saving grace. It is so dang good and makes me feel like I am eating bad though I am staying on my diet plan. Ranch has hardly any sugar or carbs in it. Anyways, I have a hard time resisting potato and pasta salad so I put a tiny scoopful on my plate and moved along to building my sandwich. I noticed giant lettuce leaves and decided to make a lettuce wrap with cold cuts and other veggies. I gotta say, I was not thrilled with this. I have never had a sandwich without bread and it was making me sad to think about. As I neared the end of the table, I noticed a table full of cookies. First bad thought of the day... I was so tempted to take one but I managed to resist. I proceeded to eat my lunch and was shocked at how delicious it was. Sandwiches without bread really are not bad and it allows you to really taste the other ingredients. Sandwiches often have too much bread that it drowns out the other flavors. Not only was my wrap and salad amazing, my two bites of potato salad were mind glowingly good. I have noticed that bad foods taste so much better now that I don't eat them often. This could be another blessing or curse. I will admit, I had a few thoughts of going back up and getting more of that potato salad. Meanwhile, my tablemates were all commenting about how the cookies were not very good at all. It was nice to hear that since it reaffirmed that I was right not taking one. However, this was not the last I would see or hear about the cookie.
While volunteering, I started getting hungry but I had forgot to bring a healthy snack. After wandering around trying to find a snack, the only option I had were those same damn cookies. After much debating with myself, I decided it shouldn't hurt to have one cookie to tide me over for the rest of the afternoon. So I went for it. Even though that cookie was not all that great, it tasted amazing. But afterward, I instantly felt guilty.
When leaving the Bar conference, I was having second thoughts about exercising. I was so tired and I really felt like laying in bed watching TV. Luckily, I regained my composure, thought it through, and as that cookie eating went round in my head, I decided it was best to stick to my original plan and go exercise. I walked/ ran on the treadmill for 30 minutes and felt terrific about myself. On the way home though, cravings took over and had the evil thought of stopping at a fast food place for a chicken sandwich. I went straight home to convince my husband to go with me to Jack in the Box but my plans were thwarted thankfully. The hubby reminded me that I spent a ton of money on healthy food and that would be money lost. So here I sit eating a piece of salmon and a southwest salad (which by the way is really fricken good). Later fellow dieters.
Wednesday, June 24, 2015
6/23/15
Day two of the diet/ exercise program. I felt pretty good for the most part. I was a bit concerned that I was going to slip up a bit at a lunch meeting I had to attend. The food was provided and you just never know what is going to be available. Luckily, the place serving the lunch provided lots of vegetables and actually had a meat dish that was not covered in a sugary sauce. They also had a lot of bread, potatoes, pasta salad, and dessert. I managed to get away virtually unscathed and opted for lots of garden salad with ranch, a heaping pile of steamed veggies, a chicken picatta breast (in a creamy savory sauce), and a tiny scoopful of bowtie pasta salad (I have a hard time resisting pasta salad). I stayed away from the bread, potatoes, and opted for no dessert. I never drink soda which I am not sure if that is a curse or a blessing. On one hand, I want to think it is a good thing but at the same time, if I soda was a large part of what led to me getting fat, then it would be an easy thing to cut out and lose weight in theory. Anyways, I was really surprised that my lunch was actually delicious and left me satisfied. I didn't feel like I was missing out by not eating the Carb and sugar heavy foods. But the best thing was the sense of pride I had that I had resisted the urge to splurge on these things.
When I got home, I had planned on exercising but my husband mentioned that his dad was coming to looked at our AC the next day. This made us feel like we needed to clean our house so I spent my time doing that. At first, I was upset that I didn't exercise but the more I thought about it, the cleaning was exercise in it's own right. I was up and moving more than I usually do so I felt better after thinking about that. However, after all the cleaning, I wanted something quick to eat for dinner. I decided to have a bowl of cereal, total with sliced banana. Sounds healthy right? Well it would have been if I had stuck to the 3/4 cup serving shown on the boxes nutrition facts. However, I had triple that. I felt so horrible about myself but luckily, I have an amazing husband who helped me see the light and to stop beating myself up. He asked me "did you do better today than you were doing the same day last week?" Of course I have! The same last week, I wasn't eating anything the entire day and then stuffing myself with a Jack in the box chicken sandwich and 4 monster taco's. This made me realize that I am human and I am going to accidentally slip up at times. The important thing is that I move forward and keep doing my best.
When I got home, I had planned on exercising but my husband mentioned that his dad was coming to looked at our AC the next day. This made us feel like we needed to clean our house so I spent my time doing that. At first, I was upset that I didn't exercise but the more I thought about it, the cleaning was exercise in it's own right. I was up and moving more than I usually do so I felt better after thinking about that. However, after all the cleaning, I wanted something quick to eat for dinner. I decided to have a bowl of cereal, total with sliced banana. Sounds healthy right? Well it would have been if I had stuck to the 3/4 cup serving shown on the boxes nutrition facts. However, I had triple that. I felt so horrible about myself but luckily, I have an amazing husband who helped me see the light and to stop beating myself up. He asked me "did you do better today than you were doing the same day last week?" Of course I have! The same last week, I wasn't eating anything the entire day and then stuffing myself with a Jack in the box chicken sandwich and 4 monster taco's. This made me realize that I am human and I am going to accidentally slip up at times. The important thing is that I move forward and keep doing my best.
Monday, June 22, 2015
Today I take back my life
I feel as though today is the start of the rest of my life. For those of you that know me, this might sound a bit odd considering that I am 32 years old. But allow me to explain. For the past 10 years, I pretty much wasted my younger years away and took a lot for granted. Don't get me wrong, I have a great life. I have an amazing husband, a big house, and as of recent, a great job that has made me realize my true potential. The latter I believe is what truly jump started my ambition and made me realize I can do anything and I just need to keep pushing forward no matter how difficult things might seem. So if I seem to have it all, what exactly am I referring to that has made me feel like today is the beginning of the rest of my life? Well for the past 10 years, I have been overweight, eating whatever I've wanted and being lazy. I quit caring about my appearance, but worse than that, I quit caring about my health. At one point, there was a glimmer of hope and I lost 25 pounds, down from 160 to 135. I remember feeling great. I am not sure what it was but something threw me off the wagon once that happened, I never attempted to get back up. I am now at my heaviest, 162 pounds and feeling the worst about myself that I've ever felt. I know I am not an ugly woman, but the excess weight makes me feel like a blob. I feel as though everyone is staring at me, particularly when I order something bad at a restaurant and they are thinking "look at that fat, gross pig." Lately, the media has began to have a more positive outlook on "girls with curves" but this has still not made me feel good about myself. I don't considered what I have simply curves and I know I don't have the striking features of the plus size models being praised. If it weren't enough to have the lowest level of self esteem I've ever had, I have also had health issues arise as a result of my unhealthy lifestyle. Not only do I have high blood pressure but I have been having chest pains and had to have my first stress test and heart ultrasound a week ago. The entire time during the procedure, I kept thinking "I am too young for this." I am too young to not feel sexy in front of my husband. I am too young to worry about having a heart attack soon. So with these reasons, and the fact that I love fashion and want to fit into cute outfits, I decided to take back my life. I decided that today was going to be the first day I would work toward getting my life, looks, and health back. Plus my husband (who said he would never diet or work out) has been eating healthier, working out, and has lost almost 50 pounds so if he is doing it, I feel like I should stop making excuses and make I happen.
There are so many diets out there but I am not looking for a temporary solution. I want a diet I can stick to for the rest of my life and not feel miserable or deprived. I have watched a lot of documentaries as of late and the consensus that most people are not aware of is that high sugar and carb content in foods is what's causing America's obesity epidemic. Obviously, cutting out sugar and carbs altogether would make for a really miserable and miserable to be around Jenn. So I decided that I am going to cut back on the amounts and try to balance my Carb and sugar intake throughout the day. In addition to that, I plan on working out in some form or another for at least 45 minutes 4 days a week.
Yesterday, I created a menu of 8 days worth of meals by doing some research online and determining easy foods that would work for my diet. I am extremely busy and don't have much time to cook on weeknights so pre-made meals, frozen or canned items are truly my best friend. You would not believe though how much sugars and carbs are in these items. A lot of people have asked if I've ever tried Lean Cuisines. Of course I have but although they are thought to be healthy, most have a ton of sugar in them to make them more palatable. So what I had to do was research nutrition facts online for pre-made meals such as lean cuisines to determine which ones had low levels of Carb and sugar. After my menus were prepared, I went to the grocery and spent no joke $499.00! I about choked when they told me my total but then tried to look at the bright side that I would be getting my gas cheap since Fry's gave you gas points when you shopped in store.
Today, I actually forced myself to pack food for the entire day and to eat whenever I felt hungry. Not only that, I had a bottle of water by me at all times and drank as I would get thirsty. If I learned anything from today, it's that I need to start listening to my body. That applies also to when I am feeling full.
I know the first day is always bad but I honestly was not prepared for just how bad it was. It seemed like not matter how frequently I ate and despite the fact that I was eating a ton of protein, I was always starving. No, not just hungry, famished! I keep trying to tell myself that it will get better and my body just needs to get adjusted. Today was also the first time I had committed more than a few minutes to exercising. I walked at a fast pace (with running occasionally) on the treadmill for 20 minutes and spent 25 minutes on a stationary exercise bike peddling up multiple "hills." Surprisingly, it went by quick and wasn't too bad. The thing I know will happen and that I dread is that I will be really sore tomorrow.
Other than the feeling super hungry all day although I ate more meals in one day than I usually eat in 3, I actually felt pretty good. I felt really energetic which made my work productivity better. I felt like I stayed on task more than usual. Anyways, I am ready to go to bed but I am going to post the menu of what I ate today below. I will be keeping this journal daily in the beginning to keep track of my progress, feelings, etc. and in hopes of helping other girls who want to lose weight. I would love to hear from others about their weight loss journey so please feel free to post. Thanks
There are so many diets out there but I am not looking for a temporary solution. I want a diet I can stick to for the rest of my life and not feel miserable or deprived. I have watched a lot of documentaries as of late and the consensus that most people are not aware of is that high sugar and carb content in foods is what's causing America's obesity epidemic. Obviously, cutting out sugar and carbs altogether would make for a really miserable and miserable to be around Jenn. So I decided that I am going to cut back on the amounts and try to balance my Carb and sugar intake throughout the day. In addition to that, I plan on working out in some form or another for at least 45 minutes 4 days a week.
Yesterday, I created a menu of 8 days worth of meals by doing some research online and determining easy foods that would work for my diet. I am extremely busy and don't have much time to cook on weeknights so pre-made meals, frozen or canned items are truly my best friend. You would not believe though how much sugars and carbs are in these items. A lot of people have asked if I've ever tried Lean Cuisines. Of course I have but although they are thought to be healthy, most have a ton of sugar in them to make them more palatable. So what I had to do was research nutrition facts online for pre-made meals such as lean cuisines to determine which ones had low levels of Carb and sugar. After my menus were prepared, I went to the grocery and spent no joke $499.00! I about choked when they told me my total but then tried to look at the bright side that I would be getting my gas cheap since Fry's gave you gas points when you shopped in store.
Today, I actually forced myself to pack food for the entire day and to eat whenever I felt hungry. Not only that, I had a bottle of water by me at all times and drank as I would get thirsty. If I learned anything from today, it's that I need to start listening to my body. That applies also to when I am feeling full.
I know the first day is always bad but I honestly was not prepared for just how bad it was. It seemed like not matter how frequently I ate and despite the fact that I was eating a ton of protein, I was always starving. No, not just hungry, famished! I keep trying to tell myself that it will get better and my body just needs to get adjusted. Today was also the first time I had committed more than a few minutes to exercising. I walked at a fast pace (with running occasionally) on the treadmill for 20 minutes and spent 25 minutes on a stationary exercise bike peddling up multiple "hills." Surprisingly, it went by quick and wasn't too bad. The thing I know will happen and that I dread is that I will be really sore tomorrow.
Other than the feeling super hungry all day although I ate more meals in one day than I usually eat in 3, I actually felt pretty good. I felt really energetic which made my work productivity better. I felt like I stayed on task more than usual. Anyways, I am ready to go to bed but I am going to post the menu of what I ate today below. I will be keeping this journal daily in the beginning to keep track of my progress, feelings, etc. and in hopes of helping other girls who want to lose weight. I would love to hear from others about their weight loss journey so please feel free to post. Thanks
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